Saturday 3 October 2015

SINGH IS BLIING: Bad, boorish and boring! [1.5/5]

Placing a graphical ‘homage’ plate belonging mostly to the financer’s/the producer’s departed family members just before the movie actually starts is an everyday fashion in Bollywood. The movie doesn’t really require to believe in following ethics and morals the ‘ever smiling’ gentleman in the picture might have been practicing all his life but his blessings are always needed there as if only that can ensure the pleasant monetary shower at the box-office. Now, I would like to see some bollywood films to carry an added plate of ‘RIP Cinema’ as they seldom show any hint of having the same in nature, intent and content. PrabhuDheva’s SINGH IS BLIING should be considered the leading light for putting this into practice. Leave cinema as the technique alone, this one doesn’t bother to get down to the nitty-gritty of filmmaking process i.e. story, plot and screenplay. It only marks an infertile collaboration of two so-called creative minds who think they can pull out any shit under the prestigious tag of entertainment.

SINGH IS BLIING in its name itself denies any promise to gift you anything logical or digestible. Raftaar Singh [Khiladi Kumar] is a 45 year plus blockhead who can plant a dog with artificial coat of fur when the real lion goes missing. And is also an English illiterate who won’t move an inch if you just throw the word ‘go’ at him and don’t signal with your hands. I wonder if the ‘Sarv Shiksha Abhiyaan’ is really a success or the Punjab shown in the film is actually on Mars! Meanwhile, a Romanian girl Sara [Amy Jackson] has to come to India [comfortably in Goa] as some crazyhead gangster [Kay Kay Menon] wants her life for I don’t recall why. Raftaar is now guarding her body with two equally irritating friends from Punjab and a geeky translator [Lara Dutta, actually and only one funny]. What follows next can never be described as a storyline. There are only a number of skits put together to reach an average film’s length. The girl has also a hidden agenda to search for her separated mommy. Raftaar has to take her Punjab for exactly 4 scenes and a song. The love-story between an English ignorant and the exact opposite girl blooms over annoying conversations full of miscommunication and more than 60% of it being subtitled in Hindi. And then; a side-track involving Lara and the two supporting comedians where Lara sleepwalks [Why to only blame her if everyone else also does the same in the film?] and crushes both’s manhood responsible for reproduction purposes with coconut! Painful it is. For viewers too!

PrabhuDheva’s rotten idea of comedy gels perfectly with the mannerism-driven physical buffoonery Akshay Kumar brings on screen. He is cool, casual and confident about him playing a Mr. Beans with turban. With no rhyme or reason, Kumar and Prabhu both keep exploiting the Sikh-sentiments throughout the film. Amy Jackson as the goon-bashing girl is narrowed to speak in accented English and is never forced to try Hindi dialogues. Strategy to save some nuisance successful! Kay Kay Menon looks out still stuck in his DRONA days. In his limited role, he’s limited too. The son of Shashi Kapoor, Kunal Kapoor [of VIJETA fame] makes a guest appearance and does succeed in reminding his father’s on-screen charisma and presence in flares and flashes. Lara Dutta plays it very outlandish; but trust me, it works very well in favor of the character’s guts. Her character might go main lead from the supporting cast if someone behind the writing desk could identify the hidden potential there.

Overall, SINGH IS BLIING is nothing but a smart selling idea to encash the success of SINGH IS KINGG. The next offering in the series could be anything under the name ‘SINGH IS FLING’ or ‘SINGH IS CLING’. After all, who cares what it means? The film sees ‘Grazing Goat Pictures’ credited for the story. Now, I can imagine why. Who would want to get associated with such inadmissible, unfortunate and regrettable piece of writing? Avoidable! [1.5/5]           

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