HAPPY NEW YEAR: 8-pack doesn’t disappoint! Laughter pack does! [2/5]

Farah Khan’s HAPPY NEW YEAR has blockbuster written all over it. So is Farah Khan’s trademark sense of humor coming out of anything & everything from sexist scrutiny and racist remarks to murderous-merciless mocking at the purest human emotions people usually love to cherish! So if you find nothing bad in ‘alag sirf NAME hain, baaki sab SAME hain’ comment on how Korean and Chinese people look relatively identical to a common ignorant Indian; there are chances you will love HAPPY NEW YEAR for its unarguably pathetic gags, hamming performances and an uneventful heist-plot even any of Farah Khan’s cute triplet could come up to start with.

HAPPY NEW YEAR is nothing but a wastrel celebration of two Khan’s collaboration for a gala event where audiences are cordially invited but their sensibility is taken for granted at many levels. The man on mission here is Charlie [Shah Rukh Khan], a son seeking revenge of his father’s unjust fate from a rich heartless fraud [Jackie Shroff]. To give him back what he deserves, Charlie plans to rob him of his diamonds worth gallons of millions. And there forms, a group of six losers as they love to call themselves with a mother-powered unmarried Parsi [Boman], a tapori [Abhishek], a bar dancer [Deepika], a young tech-savvy hacker [Vivaan] and a strapping & stripping stuntman [Sonu Sood]! But before the D-day comes, they have to be on stage participating in the ‘World Dance Championship’ i.e. ‘India’s got talent’ goes global!

Being unapologetically self-assured about her idea of mass-entertainment, Farah hardly tries to sound or look smart when it comes to give us a plot tagged with predictability as its only nature. Do not think harder or rather not even attempt it and you will easily foresee the next sharp turn ahead. Same goes with the gags. It’s either someone who can’t speak English or someone who has hearing impairment to produce cheap word-plays. Before Shah Rukh playing the master-planner and the captain of the ship comes up with the punch line spoken thrice in the film, “Every loser gets at least one chance to emerge as the winner”; let me tell you the concept of losers shown here. The Parsi brat stammers. The bar dancer constantly gets humiliated as being ‘Bazaaru Aurat’ by no one lesser than our leading man himself and easily falls in trap with his charming looks and English speaking skills. How pitiable can our Indian ladies be! At least in bollywood movies! On the other hand, we have Sonu Sood playing a strong-built single-headed who can jump into a fight soon someone shows disrespect to his mother but he himself doesn’t hesitate mouthing foul words having sisters in center. Double standards! Whatever creates humor!

With a tiring, tedious and repetitive 3 hours of duration, HAPPY NEW YEAR falls short of juicy dialogues, enjoyable dance numbers and praiseworthy performances. Only breathing space you notice is Shah Rukh’s magnetic screen presence, Deepika’s charismatic dance moves and Abhishek’s comic relief but as if Farah would not compromise with her instinct to ruin all emotions, she brings patriotism in the scene just before you try to locate the exit. You can be talent-killer. You can proudly be a robber. You also can be insensitively rude towards your fellow member of human race but just one patriotic song at the end with a tricolor in the backdrop and no one could ever question your heroism. Anyways, who bothers if the man in question is the king of Bollywood himself!

I clearly remember having greater laughs in a couple of ‘Comedy night with Kapil’ episodes on TV where the cast of HAPPY NEW YEAR appeared as its promotional routine. Well, I better go search those on YouTube after resting my case here.  That was epic! This is gimmick! A wafer pack full with air, if you get it! Watch it if you must! [2/5]