ISSAQ: Leave this unintentionally funny love-story of epic fail alone! [1.5/5]

When, in the very first half, people of all ages sitting around you in a multiplex auditorium start giggling, chattering, commenting, questioning and mocking on the relativity of the film & the sensibility of the filmmaker, one must learn that there is something that has gone wrong while trying to create something impressive.

Manish Tiwary’s ISSAQ- a modern day adaptation of Shakespearean love-story Romeo & Juliet, is one such shameful effort that scrawls and struggles to be ambitiously epic romantic thriller set in Banaras. But thanks to the brigade of most horrible performers in the cast, tacky screenplay and the immature-uncontrolled-abandoned direction that submerges all the potentials and promises to make it an unintentionally funny outing for cinema-lovers.

First of all, the Banaras shown here is not the likeable-lovable-pleasingly colourful Banaras of ‘Raanjhanaa’ but more of a bloody violent-fiercely infuriated & uncivilized rustic one that breathes into an air filled with the smell of gunpowder & explosives of all kind. Rahul & Bachchi [played by Prateik & Amyra] falls in love despite all the warnings to stay away from each other as they belong to families of blood-thirsty rivals. And, they only look at it as just another reason to keep the war alive to establish one’s supremacy.

Unexpectedly ISSAQ has some of the best talents in its ensemble supporting cast like Prashant Narayanan as menacing naxal leader, Neena Gupta as the old confidante & caretaker, Rajeshwari Sachdev as manipulative young wife to Sudhir Pandey- another respected name and Makrand Deshpande as witty babaji with chillum…but for one or another reasons, they all look wasted and quite out of the place in their acting skills probably because of the bumpy- patchy messy plot-subplot labyrinth. Pratiek needs serious lessons in acting including voice modulations. Amyra impresses especially in a scene where she had to recite excerpts from Jayshankar Prasad’s Kamayani in the classroom. Ravi Kishan knows his limits and decides better not to break them. Vineet Singh sure had a longer canvas to milk his potential but not the better one.

In a scene when Makrand sees his devotees getting bored and feeling drowsy over his divine gyaan, he immediately switches to perform a miraculous gimmick to keep them attentive. Unfortunately, Manish Tiwari didn’t have even such gimmicks to make viewers indulged and devoted to the film.  Language being too colloquial-too slangish, editing being weirdly abrupt at places and the uncleaned visual effects are just a few put-offs to name. Only positives are the cinematography and detailing in the art & setting department. You can look out for the real Banaras but only in corners of the frame and in the backdrop, mostly out of focus!

All in all, this mocking love-story that doesn't even spare itself to laugh at, is nothing but a complete waste of nearly 2 & half hours and your hard earned money! Leave it alone…and better look out for other options of entertainment, this weekend! [1.5/5]

BAJATEY RAHO: A small film that limits itself in being a regular DVD film [2/5]

In literal sense, ‘BAJATEY RAHO’ could be taken as a term used notably in North India for conning people vigorously. But in another, it could also represent our very much Indian spirit to celebrate life uncontrollably. Titled as the same, Shashant Shah’s slice-of-life 'Punjabi at heart' comic caper finds its framework foundation on both the grounds but unfortunately fails to impress with a half-cooked storyline and a strictly ‘wannabe’ emotional laugh-riot, clad in a look & feel borrowed from Dibakar Bannerjee’s one of the bests KHOSLA KA GHOSLA.

Sabharwal, played by Ravi Kishan, is a name of crime syndicate that deals in making illegal money from every potential sector like education industry [I call it that because it sure is manufacturing materialistic supplies that are totally in demand on a conveyor belt manner], production of synthetic food items using harmful chemicals and in the most easy money making venture banking with chit-fund kind of concepts that incidentally end up being a cheat fund.

An unfortunate honest man ends his life after being victimized for the bad man’s sinister acts and now, his family [Headed by the impressively presentable Dolly Ahluwalia as his widow, Tusshar as his son and the powerful combination of Vinay Pathak & Ranvir Shorey as their friends in need] has nothing to lose & left much to do except striking back with a solid plan to rob the robber.

From the plot mentioned above to the earthy-rustic characters that has lingo and jargon of a typical Delhiite, from the ‘been there-seen that’ settings to the ‘I see it coming’ regular casting, there is not a single chance that you won’t recall your ‘KHOSLA KA GHOSLA’ experience that still tends to seize your mind with matter of the fact wit in the situation & extremely amusing characters. Well, that could easily have gone in favor of the film but the problem is that it could never remove the tag of a ‘wannabe’.

Even in a short duration of 107 min, if you can not embrace yourself from putting unnecessary romantic track with songs, you seriously need to think of going back on writing table again & again till you do it right! The only time I felt an uncontrolled pleasant stretch in my facial muscles was when Vinay Pathak dressed & sounded as a ‘Narendra Chanchal’ look-like singer, goes for a devotional parody of ‘tainu main love kardaan’ from the forgettable ‘Desi Boys’…and some of the scenes having Dolly Ahluwalia ruling out everyone else in the frame.   

At the end, it is a small film that doesn’t dream big in its approach and limits itself in being a regular DVD film. There are moments to cherish and relish you when in dull mood but not enough to rush to the nearest theater. [2/5]

SHIP OF THESEUS: rarest of the rare, one-of a- kind cinema [4.5/5]

It is not always for a filmmaker to be evolved as an utter example of great artisan-ship in creating stories that impress you with beautiful amalgamation of moving visuals & sounds but sometimes, even a viewer would require to contribute a good amount of active participation bodily & mentally both…& no one can deny that it is rarest of rare case when it comes to Indian cinema [Considering Bollywood just being a small part of the whole].

Debutante Anand Gandhi’s thought-provoking, soul-stirring, brain-stimulating philosophical drama SHIP OF THESEUS is one of a kind cinema. It not only fuels your senses, mainly the thinking bones but also questions rationally the very existence of your beliefs, philosophy & ideas about life…that too, in the most impressive way ever in the history!

Founded on a paradox popularly known as ‘ship of theseus’ which, in simple words, can be put as ‘if a ship gets all its parts replaced with new ones, will the ship be same as it was before or it will be a changed one?’. It intriguingly weaves three razor-sharp stories that not only are sensitive to the care but intelligently coherent, entirely relevant, very much real and surprisingly entertaining too. So, its not one of those ‘lackluster, all pseudo-intellectual long monologues- no entertainment’ arty farty!

Aliya, after losing her eye-sight from a corneal infection, develops a unique ability to photograph people & things around her by just monitoring the sound they make. Thanks to the medical science, she is now ready for a corneal transplant. Will the senses rebel to work normal or she will find a new route to enjoy life?

Maitreya, a cultured monk involved religiously in a fight against drug making multi-nationals to ban animal testing, is diagnosed with advanced stage of liver cirrhosis that would enforce him to inhale medicines he always was in opposition to. Will he be able to overcome his inner conflicts for the sake of saving his own life?

Navin, a money-driven stockbroker stumbles on the truth about illegal kidney selling rackets in the city just after he’s done with his kidney transplantation. Now in the piercingly painful guilt of being an accused of same sin, will he , for a change, rise up for the right leaving his fascination for worldly possession aside?

All these questions will sure have a definite answer to conclude things but not without overwhelming you with an irresistibly confident & competent cast that delivers a flawless textbook performance. Aida-El-Kashif sweetly slips into the character of a blind girl and even for once, you will not bring her proficiency into matter. She is poised, comfortable, convinced & aptly natural. Neeraj Kabi gives his blood & flesh to the character of monk, in literal sense. Watch his physical transformation during his infirmity days and you’ll know how far an actor can go to make it all believable. Sohum Shah is extremely likeable and comes out as the most alluring performer of the lot. Even the co-artistes mark their presence with a sheer honesty and total dedication to their respective jobs.

Pankaj Kumar’s breathtaking cinematography does not need words to express its brilliance. When was the last time you saw something so absorbing that you never want it to end? From capturing the vivaciously sound of nature and the silence crowded lanes in metros can produce, you’ll never find a single frame that is not imaginative, that is not impressive. Great job done!

To sum up things, Anand Gandhi boldly sails through the changing times in Indian cinema, leaving all his contemporary filmmakers behind and setting up new promises of a better Bollywood, surely not bigger in budgets but greater in concepts and more ardent in execution  He’s one hell of the best things happen to Indian cinema in recent times. And, for the film? Well, do not call yourself a cinema-lover or a film-fanatic, if you haven’t watch it twice, at least. [4.5/5]

D-DAY: drought of a good thriller still haunts Bollywood [2.5/5]

Every time a terrorist attack happens in any part of our country, the conversation among common people & the ‘on serious note’ panel discussions on TV get heated with mostly unrequited-unresolved demand for the exile of the most wanted criminal, reportedly residing now in one of the posh cities of our neighboring country.

We all have wanted that much-awaited extradition for ages, and God only knows if that would be possible ever in the future but for now, Nikhil Advani’s sincerely executed yet flawed-Bollywood at heart-taut thriller of high promises D-DAY offers a ‘dream come true’ fictional story line, largely getting built up on ‘would have been-should have been’ conditions applied.

Taking cues from real incidents, in-depth functioning of intelligence agencies & the earnest psyche of undercover agents, where an impressive first half suggests it being an intelligent, well researched, on real locations espionage drama with four Indian secret agents starting off their mission to get Goldman [the man in pink shades modeled on the Dawood Ibrahim, played by immensely likeable Rishi Kapoor] back to India, the second half pointlessly falters with focusing more on the masala; Bollywood is known to plant whenever they start lacking on gripping plots. So, we see emotional urges taking over obvious astuteness, regular tiffs between the team, hard-to-believe successful escape plans and an unfeasible end that totally is to please & blow away audience’s various sentiments regarding this national issue sounded more like a personal war for every countryman. Get your hands ready for claps when see that happen what if only on screen!

Advani’s premise is very appealing-very mass attracting. The execution part is also thoroughly intended and incessantly belongs to the likes of any docu-drama shot in the crowded lanes of Karachi. Narrative pattern that includes timelines of the events on screen to make it look documented effort, works in favor. Special mention to the ‘Alvida’ song for its bloody beautiful visualization, literally! On the acting front, Irrfan does his part with sheer honesty. Watch out for him in heartrending scenes with his family. Arjun Rampal, Shruti Haasan & Huma Quareshi is standard. But if we are talking about performances par expectations, Rishi Kapoor as stylishly dressed Don, Aakash Dahiya as fourth player in the operation and Shriswara as Irrfan’s affably adorable wife top the list. Chandan Roy Sanyal is a complete waste.

At the end, this thrilling operation that had all the means to finish the long-awaited drought of a good thriller miserably could not meet its desirable end, thanks to its own flaws that lie in the high octane drama & a forcibly commercial end in the second half. A troubled case of wasted opportunity! [2.5/5]

SHORTS: Bigger and better than the most of usual Friday releases! [4/5]

It wasn't ages back so, I assume you remember the awe-inspiring times of Shyam Benegal, Mrinal Sen, Govind Nihlani, Saeed Akhtar Mirza and lots more, when Indian cinema discovered the term of new-wave parellel cinema aka meaningful cinema [Alas, we could access that on Doordarshan primarily either on Sunday afternoons or in late night slots] to reinvent- rekindle their conscientiousness to play a pivotal role in showing not the dreamy-saucy world of lies but the gloomy- depressingly dark world of dead reality. In today’s times, the same kind of liability and movement is being lead by Mr. Anurag Kashyap and his extremely passionate team of new-age indie filmmakers!

SHORTS is, in principle, a nicely conceived & designed bouquet of 5 award-winning short films by 5 potential filmmakers of tomorrow. Now, you can find many more short indie films swarming on social networking sites and on video sharing sites like YouTube but these 5 are the best of the bests…and comparatively bigger & better than the most of usual Friday releases.

Directed by Shlok Sharma, SUJATA is a hard-hitting tale of an intrafamilial sexual abuse victim who has been in such painful state for years and is now left with no other option but to rebel & react. Huma Qureshi thrives in hitting every chord just right in every moment she’s in.  

THE EPILOGUE by Siddharth Gupt creates a modern-age thriller, innovatively conceptualized with striking amalgamation of interesting visuals & sound cuts. You won’t find any dialogues here but a suggestively haunting giggles and chuckles of Richa Chaddha, playing a wild, aggressive, unstable, unreal lover to a man confined & restrained to his own. This film leaves a lot unanswered to challenge you to interpret. Impressive!    

Anirban Roy’s AUDACITY is about a free-spirited girl trapped into her own house with a father who spends his nights playing card-games with friends from neighborhood and a mother who’s always into cooking and ‘poojas’. This portrayal of typical Bengali middle-class family routine is pleasantly ended with reasonable suggestion of a way out.   

MEHFUZ by Rohit Pandey starts with Gulzar saab’s ‘Maut tu ek kavita hai, mujhse ek kavita ka waada hai milegi mujhko’, lines getting lived by a dead faced man, missing an alive warmth of companionship while sincerely taking care of unidentified-unattended dead bodies. The pain of longing and the unmoved, hard-to-shake almost dead emotions are beautifully enacted by Nawazuddin. Romancing with the dead!

& lastly, Neeraj Ghaywan’s excruciatingly real SHOR that shows the troubled times in life of a North Indian dysfunctional family of working wife, unemployed husband and an unreasonable mother, in the city of dreams Mumbai. Vineet singh outshines along with Ratnabali Bhattacharjee to evoke an emotional outburst that starts on a very sore, stinging and discomforting level but ends up with lumps in your throat, tears in eyes & a smile with a hope that everything will be settled after.

Beautifully shot, brilliantly executed concepts, perfectly created tone to suit each story differently and accordingly! This presentation is an actor’s delight, filmmaker’s pride and viewer’s choice. If you see cinema as an art, this is for you. If you see cinema as a medium of expression, this is for you. If you see cinema as a serious business or a career option, this is definitely for you. I just wish I could see a time when every Friday I have something like this. Overwhelming Experience! ****[4/5]

SIXTEEN: a teenage drama…admirable in efforts that sadly leave no mark.

Bollywood has always been short of coming-of-age teenage flicks [dharma productions’ GIPPI was the last in the list] that could honestly relate to a teenager’s state of mind crossing through certain kind of changing phase physically, psychologically, socially and in his/her personal understandings about the world around them.

Debutant director Raj Purohit’s SIXTEEN sure dares to speak about issues like attaining puberty, confusing career choices, strict parental monitoring, heartbreak, first crush, anxiety over virginity, taboo sexual desires and all that have been wrapped under sheets and are very much responsible for shaping up one’s character once and for all. Though the amateurish, uncontrolled & sloppy direction eats out most of the promises it had made with its neat-clean-confident look & feel, but no one can deny that it is bold-brave and beautiful in efforts that sadly never turns as fruitful as it should have been!

Film starts with a montage of 4 urban youngsters, each caught in different set of dramatic situations and then, the narrative takes us through their life 6 months back to establish the proceedings that lead them where they are in present. Tanisha, a gutsy girl in search of her perfect guy falls for a writer double of her age. Anu is a spoiled brat who believes in living in moments of life and is now on the verge of mental breakdown after finding dark secrets of her parents. Ashwin is shattered with his first heartbreak and is now on the run after accidently killing his highly dominating father. Nidhi, though an ardently family girl, finds a positive sign in self-pregnancy test kit and doesn't want to face her parents in embarrassment after breaking their trust.

Now, all these situations are pretty regular whenever you think of a film on youth but what is commendable in this effort is that the director never compromises on the conviction he had of making an honest film, so you will never find any kind of gimmicks to en-cash such a bold film with sleazy cheeky lines or scenes. I also liked the way he molds story to discover a refreshing end. Performances are clumsy sometimes but okay for the most. Story drags a bit before meeting its end. Direction shows a promising upper hand in flashes. Look & feel is strictly urban […and it sure restricts it to only multiplex-audiences] as you might have seen on TV in ‘HIP HIP HURRAY’ & ‘REMIX’.

Overall, it is an admirable effort. But we have yet to see an impressive teenage drama that blows us away completely. Watch it if you could grab a DVD, when released. Viewing on a Sunday afternoon, sitting on the couch at your home will make it more enjoyable. **[2/5]

BHAAG MILKHA BHAAG: melodramatic approach kills the intensity! Farhan steals the show!!

Titled as ‘The Flying Sikh’ by the Government of Pakistan, Milkha Singh is indisputably a living legend in Indian sports. Period. Now, possibilities are that most of us might not know the real story behind why he could not bring us ‘the’ gold medal in Olympics or we might just have our minds crammed with numerous assumptions and ‘I have heard it somewhere’ theories about the incident but the fact remains unharmed that Milkha Singh was/is & will be the man of such stature that can only be accomplished in guidance of the best teacher one can have, called life.

With BHAAG MILKHA BHAAG- a 3 hour 8 min long biopic, Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra tries to peep into the ‘never been opened’ chapters of his life but sadly decides to take a route, very obvious & convenient, in terms of Bollywood norms. Film starts with Milkha losing out medal in Rome Olympics and denying to participate in an Indo-Pak sports summit organized soon after. & then we take a trip back and forth in flashback and in present [the very impressive narrative style we had seen in Mehra’s ‘RANG DE BASANTI’ in not so appealing manner, the thrills and the charm is missing] to excavate the dark past of ’47 partition that still haunts him and is never ready to leave him alone, to deal with his own set of fears.

The story does have a promise and an undeniable need to be told to our new generation but Mehra’s melodramatic approach to recreate sequences and a forced effort to make each one of them entertaining, kills the much required intensity & sensitivity in the tale. Situations get cyclic at a point of time when you see races ending up in a same manner. And in the second half mostly, all of sudden Milkha starts looking as a regular Bollywood hero that could overcome any mountain-size hurdles but very conveniently and guess what? He even does a song & dance sequence with an Australian beauty, ending up in a lip-lock and a steamy love-making scene.

Technically speaking, film does not falter in its most aspects like cinematography [with the magical eyes of Binod Pradhan], soaring music-background score and a stellar performance by Farhan Akhtar [His all flesh & blood dedication, commitment and a complete devotion to his part is worth accolade and applause from left, right and center] but what makes it restricted to ‘just a good effort’ is the lack of honesty, delicacy and smartness in the direction…and of course, a strict chopping hands on editing table would have contributed more to make things look crisper and cleaner.

I wish if the drama has not taken over the emotions, it would have been much better. Even so, it’s a good watch! Thanks to Farhan! Watch out for his washroom scene where he slaps himself continuously to punish him. I have yet to see such sincere involvement in a performance as an actor. All in all, BHAAG MILKHA BHAAG rides high on entertainment but lacks at the emotional connect. Watch it for Milkha Singhji and you’ll be coming out of theaters, falling for Farhan! ***[3/5]  

LOOTERA: old-school romance retold-redefined in the finest form of cinema!

Move over instant love, experience intense love! Vikramaditya Motwane’s love saga LOOTERA is an old-school romance [all those Dev Anand classics if you remember] retold-redefined in the finest & superlative form of cinema. It’s pure, unadulterated and subtly mesmerizing in its each frame with an everlasting depth of emotions we naively have lost somewhere in today’s ‘where the hell are we going so fast’ way of life. So, it’s time to rediscover priceless moments of love, heartbreak, longing and redemption deep down within our ‘still very much alive’ hearts.

A heartfelt story inspired by O. Henry’s THE LAST LEAF, smoothly & unhesitantly transports you in times of 1950’s where vintage cars, regal mansions and zameendars in fears of ‘soon to be taken care of’ by the government of India come involuntarily in picture, in any given scenario. Varun- a swindler disguised as an archaeologist enters into vivaciously alive Pakhi’s life only to fall in love but with no fortitude to pursue it further and returns back in his dark galore of crime after blatantly shattering Pakhi’s world. The fate brings them together again, now in the turmoil of more harsh emotions like retribution & redemption. 

With Mahendra Shetty’s charismatically painted-tainted-printed perfect picture frames, a thoroughly meticulous Art Direction, well-researched costume design, and spellbound performances that leave you speechless, this modern masterpiece is worth every penny you spend in the name of cinema. Sonakshi surprises you the most and come out as a winner all the way so does Ranveer. Great to find that the actor in question could really pull out in every situation he’s put into. Character artistes [Aadil Hussain as inspector K N Singh and the actor playing Pakhi’s Father] are also a reason to hold your interest intact while experiencing this picturesque & poetic journey of love.

But this writing-work will never get its dues if I can’t have praises for the captain of ship Mr. Motwane. In his directorial debut UDAAN, we all might have missed his simply understated finesse of art & craft because of revelation that it came with such beautiful story with unheard unseen before emotions but this time with LOOTERA, he doesn’t leave any stone unturned, any effort undone that has even a bare minimum chance to doubt on the filmmaker’s sense, sensibility and sensitivity. If UDAAN pronounced him Bollywood’s one of the finest storyteller, LOOTERA crowns him as the most evolved filmmaker, to my surprise in his only second venture.

Having stated that, I can not miss my warning that if you like to visit Cinemas only for a full-on entertainers having slapstick comedies, popular item numbers and nonsense action, this is strictly not yours type. It takes its time to grow on you, like love does in most cases and also it doesn’t always speak in words but emotions flow all over on this grand canvas of cinematic excellence. Experience it. [4/5]