बादशाहो: 'डिसअपॉइंटमेंट, डिसअपॉइंटमेंट, डिसअपॉइंटमेंट'! [1.5/5]

महीने भर के अंतर पर ही, 'बादशाहो' दूसरी ऐसी फिल्म है जो सन् 1975 में इंदिरा गांधी सरकार के आपातकाल को अपनी कहानी का आधार बनाती है. मधुर भंडारकर की 'इंदू सरकार' ने परदे पर जहां सिनेमा के शऊर, सिनेमा की तमीज को कठघरे में ला खड़ा कर दिया था; मिलन लूथरिया ने 'बादशाहो' के साथ तो जैसे मनोरंजन पर ही इमरजेंसी लागू कर दी. 'द डर्टी पिक्चर' से 'एंटरटेनमेंट, एंटरटेनमेंट, और एंटरटेनमेंट' का जाप करने वाले मिलन अपने फिल्म-राइटर रजत अरोरा के साथ मिलकर मसालेदार मनोरंजन के नाम पर इस बार जो कुछ भी बासी, पुराना और सड़ा हुआ परोसते हैं, उसे सवा दो घंटे तक झेलना दर्शकों के लिए खुद किसी 'आपातकाल' से कम नहीं है. 

दिमाग़ी दिवालियेपन से निकली 'बादशाहो' की कहानी जयपुर की महारानी गायत्री देवी और उनसे जुड़े तमाम सुने-सुनाये किस्सों से उधार लेकर लिखी गयी है. संजय गांधी जैसी शक्ल और तेवर वाले नेता संजीव (प्रियांशु चैटर्जी) की बुरी नज़र पहले महारानी गीतांजली देवी (इलियाना डी'क्रूज़) और अब उनके इनकार के बाद, उनके पुश्तैनी खजाने पर है. सरकार, जब्त करने के बाद, सारा सोना एक आर्मी ट्रक में भर कर जयपुर से दिल्ली के लिए निकल पड़ी है. सरकार और सेना के हाथों से सोना वापस लूटने के लिए रानी साहिबा मदद लेती हैं अपने ही वफादार भवानी (अजय देवगन) और उसके साथियों (इमरान हाश्मी, संजय मिश्रा) की. उधर सोने की हिफाजत के लिए मुस्तैद है जाबांज अफसर सहर सिंह (विद्युत् जामवाल). इसके बाद शुरू होता है वो सब कुछ, जो दशकों पहले आप वीएचएस (VHS) के ज़माने में जरूर देख चुके होंगे. 

मिलन-रजत की जोड़ी पहले भी अपने आप को दोहराती आई है. तालियों की भूखी लाइनों और शोरगुल से भरे एक्शन दृश्यों वाली फिल्मों को औसत दर्जे के अभिनय से सजा-सजा के ऐसी कहानियों को परदे पर लाना, जिनकी सारी खामियों को 'मसाला' कह के आसानी से बॉक्स-ऑफिस पर चलाया जा सके. रजत की हर लाइन में 'पंच' रचने की कोशिश इस बार औंधे मुंह गिरती है, जब हर किरदार 70s के गंवई खलनायकों और हास्य-कलाकारों की तरह बार-बार एक ही लाइन 'तकियाकलाम' की शक्ल में बोलता रहता है. फिल्म की कहानी में लॉजिक या तर्क की रत्ती भर भी गुंजाईश नहीं दिखती. पूरे महल की तलाशी को महज़ कुछ पांच-सात लोगों से अंजाम दे दिया जाता है, सन् 75 के जमाने में 'वो उन्हें जरूर कॉल करेगी' जैसी गलतियां भर-भर के हैं, इमरजेंसी के दौर में भी आइटम-नंबर की जगह और इन सबसे ऊपर डकैती के कुछ बुनियादी उसूल. फिल्म में डकैती को अंजाम तक पहुंचाने में जितनी रुकावटें, जितनी बाधाएं बताई जा रही हों, सबको एक-एक करके पार करने की जद्दोजेहद. 

अभिनय में अजय देवगन सीधे विमल गुटखे के विज्ञापन से निकल कर राजस्थान लाये गए लगते हैं. हाँ, गंभीर अभिनय के नाम पर उनके किरदार में हंसी-ठिठोली की कमी भरपूर रखी गयी है. सेक्सिस्म का लबादा ओढ़े हाशमी अपनी पुरानी हरकतों के बदौलत ही फिल्म में रेंगते नज़र आते हैं. संजय मिश्रा ही हैं, जो इस डूबती फिल्म में पत्ते की तरह बहते हुए थोड़ा बहुत हास्य उत्पन्न कर पाते हैं. इलियाना और जामवाल परदे पर थोड़ा स्टाइल जरूर बिखेर पाते हैं. फिल्म में इस्तेमाल राजस्थानी बोली उतनी ही नकली लगती है, जितनी फिल्म की कहानी में इमरजेंसी का मुद्दा. अंत तक आते-आते फिल्म इतनी वाहियात हो जाती है कि टिकट पर खर्च किये 150-200 रूपये भी आपको बड़ी लूट की तरह झकझोर देती है.

आखिर में; जिस फिल्म का टाइटल ही बेमतलब, बकवास और सिर्फ बोलते वक़्त वजनी लगने की गैरत से रख दिया गया हो, फिल्म की कहानी से कुछ लेना-देना न हो, उस फिल्म से बनावटीपन और थकाऊ मनोरंजन के सिवा आप चाहते भी क्या थे? तकलीफ ये है कि लाखों (उस वक़्त के हिसाब से) के सोने की कीमत और अहमियत बार-बार बताने वाली 'बादशाहो', अपनी चीख-पुकार, चिल्लाहट से सोने के असली सुख से भी आपको वंचित रखती है. वरना सवा दो घंटे की नींद भी कम फायदे का सौदा नहीं होती! [1.5/5]

UNGLI: What a waste of a noble intent! [2/5]

Corruption has now been so widespread in our system and quite an acceptable thing in a sense that we often don’t even try to be judgmental about it. No wonder when the creative brain behind the critically acclaimed RANG DE BASANTI, Rensil D’Silva decides to bring the story of an unusual ‘fight against corruption movement’ on screen again, even he doesn’t try to sound deep, profound and sure about the solution. So, we see a group of young souls coming together to punish the ‘corrupts’ in the most absurd but enjoyable manner, of course to the viewers and not the victims. Despite showing sincerity in the objective, UNGLI stays low, average, mindless and an infertile effort, mainly because of the lack of gravity in the treatment.

A retired old man [S M Zaheer seen in a long time] is forced to make regular visits at the government office to get his hard-earned pension sanctioned as he can’t stand the significance of bribery in the system. An autowallah asks for double-fare as the distance is too short to make big money. And then, there is corruption in the police organization to get preferred profitable postings by paying heavy sum to some illicit third party. All the instances are no new but the punishments set by the new ray of hope fondly called as the ‘Ungli’ gang are sure innovative and dramatically entertaining. Corrupts are made running non-stop for their lives in the sports ground. Some go under trial to eat the money in its most literal sense. And the Mumbai autowallah is sent to Delhi in the rail-cargo with his auto to satisfy his hunger for ‘lamba-bhaada’.  

The ‘Ungli’ gang includes a medical intern [Kangna Ranaut], a crime-journalist [Randeep Hooda], a computer engineer [Neil Bhoopalam] and a pizza-loving muscleman [Angad Bedi] with the new entrance, an expert in kissing stuck in the midway to find out true colors in his personality [Emraan Hashmi]. Meanwhile, the police [Led by Sanjay Dutt playing his age for a change] are all seen treating them as the most dangerous group ever came on this planet. Come on, don’t they have enough celebrity programs to attend and provide security to the most undesirable politicians? Leave these guys alone, as they won’t last long considering their one-dimensional performances and the all uncooked mediocre lines they speak with full intensity. Picture this, “mujhe sudhaarte-sudhaarte, sudhaarne wale bigad gaye” or “Aansuon se sirf whisky dilute hoti hai”. Claps? Mention not, please!

Rensil D’Silva’s UNGLI is also a big fail in its screenplay. You always get confused with the timelines after each cut in the shots. Neha Dhupia playing a TV journalist and the veteran Raza Murad playing the Commissioner of Police come back in a regular interval only to show their disappointment in trying to catch & cover the gang but nothing to call it a success in their kitties as the gang is apparently so smart; which again they aren’t. Performances are equally unremarkable. Sanjay Dutt being the most avoidable to comment and Randeep being the most tolerable of the lot!    

D’Silva’s UNGLI takes huge inspiration from his RANG DE BASANTI in its intention but ends up abusing it in similar ways he gives the title ‘Basanti’ to the booty-shaking girl [Shraddha Kapoor tries her hands] in the most idiotically written item song ‘Dance Basanti’. What a repositioning! And what a waste of a noble intent! [2/5]

CITYLIGHTS: Tragic tale of shattered dreams…and viewer’s disappointment! [2.5/5]

Remakes are not alien to the ‘Bhatt’ camp but when this giant movie production company selected one small but beautiful British indie film ‘METRO MANILA’ to bring on the table and later on, decided to rope in Hansal Mehta & Rajkumar Rao of last year’s most confident social-biographical film SHAHID to helm the responsibility to recreate; it looked like another feather in the hat and a sure-shot winner all the way. But Bollywood never ceases to surprise; or to disappoint in this case.

CITYLIGHTS sadly remains an average thriller with some promising scenes that make your heart bleed in depression, bloom in well-captured moments of togetherness and a savior in competent shoes of Rajkumar Rao- one of the few best things about the film.

After losing his shop in local market to the loan sharks, Deepak Singh [Rajkumar Rao] with his family is forced to migrate from Rajasthan to the city of dreams Mumbai. The search for a better lifestyle and a good prospect of earning his livelihood soon throw them in the gloomy, dark and depressing world of reality. Poverty is the biggest curse one carries and one should get it off the shoulder by any means and with all the efforts; guides his colleague at work [Maanav Kaul in a terrific presence] in a security agency. Together they seek the impossible looking road to redemption.

A tragic tale of dreams getting shattered and compromises taking over the hopes, CITYLIGHTS officially borrows the plot and the screenplay for the most parts from METRO MANILA. Kudos to the makers for giving the due credit in the said department upfront, loud & clear! This is something you don’t see often from the ‘Bhatts’. Even then, though Hansal Mehta does leave his mark in adopting it according to the Indian sensibilities and emotional connectivity in a complete manner, he certainly couldn’t refrain himself from falling into a much-comforted zone filled with standard ingredients for a Bollywood film. The songs that keep coming in chunks and bits, the gratuitously put love-making scenes with ongoing smooches as if we were in another ‘Bhatt-Emran Hashmi’ association and a completely messy-clumsy climax scene are enough to ruin the possibilities of coming up with a deserving descendant of SHAHID.

On the positive side, it is only and only the performances that stand out at a respectable position. Rajkumar Rao is in top form. He successfully inherits the mannerism, dialect and the vulnerability of a small town simpleton. His presence on screen alone is very fulfilling. Patralekha as his wife shines in her début role. This plain Jane has the sparks of a confident performer. The veteran theatre icon Maanav Kaul is a pleasant addition to the cast. A flawless performance is something he would never miss to deliver. Special mention to Rashmi Singh for her contribution in the consequential lyrics that gel well with the emotions characters carry on screen.

SHAHID being the benchmark for Mehta, CITYLIGHTS fails to triumph over the expectations one would have. A less honest effort to bring out deeply depressing reality of today’s times! Glimpse can be seen but is it good enough to even compromise? I won’t, may be because I have seen the original. Disappointed! [2.5/5]

ONCE UPON Ay TIME IN MUMBAAI DOBAARA: Stay away from this ‘all talk-no action’ bogus entertainer! [1.5/5]

Glamorizing evil and bad is not a new recipe to success in Bollywood. It has done wonders in past for superstars like Shah Rukh Khan & Sanjay Dutt but gambling totally on the same doesn’t solve the purpose unless you have a solid story line, fool-proof fail-safe screenplay and if not mightier than the bad, sure equally influential character of good merits who can rise from the downhill and surprise you in the final combat of good & bad […the best example I could remember is Aamir & Sharat Saxena’s final face-off in Ghulam], sadly and in the most disappointing way, Milan Lutharia’s ONCE UPON Ay TIME IN MUMBAAI DOBAARA lacks all except the style quotient.

First and foremost, where the prequel to same […Ajay Devgn-Emran Hashmi starrer OUATIM] was partly based on true incidents, taking cues from life & times of Haji Mustan and the momentous rise of Dawood on the map of Mumbai underworld, this sequel slips off conveniently into a fictional love-triangle. Akshaye Kumar gets into the shoes of Shoaib [played earlier by Emraan Hashmi] to create the most-stylish, charming yet menace bad guy that manages to take away all the claps & whistles with his presence on screen. He is the uncrowned man behind all the illegal businesses including cricket match-fixing. He gets what he wants by all means, be it the lady sitting on his next in the stadium. He literally can buy you an award that you aren’t even nominated for. Sonakshi Sinha plays a starlet […on the similar lines of yesteryear’s sex-siren Mandakini] who dreams to achieve big but not at the cost of everything. Imran Khan is a side-kick to Shoaib who unlike his mentor-cum-idol-cum-boss, thinks from heart rather than going with decisions that mind suggests. Rest you can guess, as it is a Bollywood love-triangle!

Of the crew, Rajat Aroraa- the man who penned the success-story of OUATIM and THE DIRTY PICTURE carries forward his trademark writing with punches possibly in every line. So, this 2 hour 40 min long power play of the good, the bad and the beauty is filled with cheesy one liners like ‘naam bata diya toh meri pehchaan bura maan jaayegi’ ‘itne saalon mein Mumbai badal gayi thi, kumkum se kimi kaatkar ho gayi thi’ ‘doodh mein jisne pehle nimbu nichoda, paneer uska’. Honestly, some really work. Most don’t. But that is not the one flaw that makes it an unbearable watch. Storyline that takes off with a power packed establishment of Shoaib’s character in the first half, looses its grip soon after introducing the love-angle and later when melodrama takes over the charge. Boredom is guaranteed in those precious minutes. Imran is sure a misfit as a tapori- mumbaiya. Sonakshi looks great in most but I would like to keep my lips sealed if asked about her performance.

There’s a scene where Imran teaches Sonakshi how to speak English and mistakenly he translates her intermediate [10+2] education as ‘Intercourse’, now if you find it a reason to chuckle or laugh, I suggest you go see some psychiatrist as soon as you finish it reading…and shockingly that sad joke goes on and one for like 3-4 scenes. To add up, I don’t why everyone including Sonali Bendre who makes an appearance in an insignificant- half baked subplot pronounces ‘Shoaib’ as ‘shoheb’. Sounds disgusting…really!

& for the makers and the director, I would like to suggest that, “agar aap aisi hi betuki bakwaas filmein banaate rahenge, audience ek na ek din jaroor bura maan jaayegi”! Overall, this sequel of high expectations sweats out to encash the success of the prequel but just finishes as an ‘all talk-no action’ bogus entertainer! Stay away!! [1.5/5]