उड़ता पंजाब (A): चुभती सच्चाई. चुभती फिल्म. [4/5]

गुलज़ार साब की ‘माचिस’ जैसी कुछेक को अलग रख कर देखें तो पंजाब को हिंदी फिल्मों ने हमेशा मीठी चाशनी में ही लपेट कर परोसा है. मुंबई का कैमरा जब भी अमृतसर, भटिंडे या पटियाले में लेंस से कैप हटाता है, हरे-पीले सरसों के खेतों में लाल-नीली चुन्नियाँ लहराती मुटियारें रोटी लेकर दौड़ लगा रही होती हैं. दिन में बैसाखी के मेले और रात में लोहड़ी का जश्न, इससे आगे बढ़ने की हिम्मत पंजाबी सिनेमा ने तो कभी-कभी दिखाई भी है पर बॉलीवुड कमोबेश बचता ही रहा है. अब तक. ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ के आने तक. पंजाब की जो सपनीली तस्वीर आपने ‘यशराज फिल्म्स’ के चश्मे से देखी थी और आज तक अपने जेहन में बसाये घूम रहे थे, अभिषेक चौबे की ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ पहले फ्रेम से ही उस तस्वीर पे चिपके ‘एनआरआई कम्पेटिबल’ चमक को खरोंचने में लग जाती है. सीने पर आतंकवाद का बोझ और पीठ पर ’84 के ज़ख्म उठाये पंजाब को अब हेरोइन, स्मैक और कोकीन की परतों ने ढक लिया है. खुरदुरी, किरकिराती, पपड़ी जमी परतों ने!  

सरसों के खेतों की जगह अब फिल्म बेरंग सफेदे [यूकेलिप्टस] के पेड़ों से शुरू होती है, वो भी रात के अँधेरे में. बॉर्डर पार से पाकिस्तान की जर्सी पहने एक खिलाड़ी हेरोइन का एक पैकेट ऐसे फ़ेंक रहा है, जैसे ओलिंपिक में मेडल जीत लेने का ये उसका आख़िरी चांस हो. नेताओं और पुलिस की मिली-भगत से चल रहे ड्रग्स के इस काले कारोबार का शिकार सब हैं, स्कूल-कॉलेज जाने वाले लड़कों से लेकर उनके पसंदीदा रॉकस्टार टॉमी सिंह [शाहिद कपूर] तक. अपनी मर्ज़ी और खुदगर्जी भरे गानों में गालियाँ बकने वाला ये रॉकस्टार हमेशा नशे में धुत्त, सनकी और गुस्सैल किस्म का आम नशेड़ी है, जिसका अपने ऊपर कोई जोर नहीं. सरताज सिंह [दिलजीत दोसंझ] एक आम पुलिसवाला है जिसे सच्चाई मानने में कोई ख़ास तकलीफ़ नहीं है तब तक, जब तक उसका छोटा भाई खुद नशे में गिरफ्त में नहीं आ जाता. डॉ. प्रीत [करीना कपूर खान] के साथ मिलकर अब सरताज इस पूरे रैकेट की जड़ तक पहुंचना चाहता है. इन सब के बीच एक बिहारन [आलिया भट्ट] भी हर पल पिस रही है. अच्छी ज़िन्दगी की तलाश ने उसे इस गर्त में ला फेंका है, अब जाने कब और कैसे इस कैद से उसकी रिहाई मुमकिन होगी?

फिल्म शुरू ही हुई है, जब थाने की कोठरी में बंद टॉमी अपने रसूख की धौंस में हो-हल्ला मचा रहा है और अपने छोटे भाई की हालत से हिला हुआ सरताज बाहर बैठा नशे को कोस रहा है. थोड़ी ही देर में आप देखते हैं, सरताज टॉमी की थप्पड़ों और घूंसों से जम कर धुलाई कर रहा है. ये बॉलीवुड के लिए नया है. इस एक वाकये से अभिषेक चौबे तय कर देते हैं कि फिल्म किरदारों को तवज्जो देती है न कि उन्हें निभाने वाले अभिनेताओं के कद को. वरना ये वही बॉलीवुड है जो परदे पर किस बड़े स्टार का नाम पहले आएगा, जैसे फ़िज़ूल के हाय-तौब्बा से निर्माताओं की जान सुखा देता था. ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ जमीनी हकीकत को इतनी बेरूखी और बेदर्दी से आपके सामने रखती है कि इसके कुछ दृश्य आपको फिल्म ख़त्म होने के काफी बाद तक परेशान करते रहते हैं. ‘एनएच 10’ के आख़िरी सीन में अनुष्का का किरदार किस बेखौफ़ियत से सिगरेट जलाती है और फिर लोहे की सरिया जमीन पर खरोंचते हुए विलेन की ओर बढती है. आज भी रोंगटे खड़े हो जाते हैं. ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ उसी धारदार कलम [सुदीप शर्मा] से निकली है.

अभिनय में शाहिद अपने ‘कमीने’ वाले पागलपन में पूरे जोश-ओ-खरोश से वापस लौट आये हैं. ठहराव में तो अभी भी गुंजाईश बहुत है पर जिस उतावलेपन और बेचैनी से वो ड्रग एडिक्ट की भूमिका निभाते हैं, कहीं कहीं अपने पिता पंकज कपूर जी की झलक छोड़ जाते हैं. करीना ठीक ही लगती हैं. दिलजीत वाकई में दिल जीत लेते हैं. एक ख़ास किस्म की सादगी तो है ही उनमें, अभिनय में भी कहीं कोई कमी नहीं दिखती. देखना होगा कि बॉलीवुड उन्हें आगे किस तरह ट्रीट करता है. और अब बात आलिया की. आलिया फिल्म की सबसे मजबूत कड़ी हैं. उनकी बिहारी बोली में थोड़ी घालमेल जरूरी दिखती है, पर जिस दर्द को वो बिना बोले फिल्म में जीते नज़र आती हैं, वो आलिया को आज के दौर के नामचीन अभिनेताओं की श्रेणी में ला खड़ा करने के लिए काफी है.

अंत में, ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ आसान फिल्म नहीं है और एकदम से परफेक्ट भी नहीं. पर फिल्म में कुछ ऐसा भी नहीं, जो नहीं कहा जाना चाहिए या जिसे बेहतर तरीके से कहा जा सकता था. गालियों की थोड़ी अति ज़रूर है पर उनसे कहीं ज्यादा चुभती है सच्चाई. फिल्म के एक हिस्से में टॉमी अपने चाहनेवालों के सामने स्टेज में बेबाकी से कह जाता है, “मुझे सिर्फ ड्रग्स पता था. अपने गाने में मैंने वही डाल दिया. मुझसे गये-गुजरे तुम लोग हो, जिन्होंने उसमें फिलोसोफी ढूंढ ली और मुझ 22 साल के लौंडे को रॉकस्टार बना दिया”. ‘उड़ता पंजाब’ देखने से ज्यादा, सोचने की फिल्म है! देखिये, सोचिये और प्लीज शुतुरमुर्ग मत बने रहिये. [4/5]      

KI & KA: KI-ling of a promising KA-ncept! [2/5]

Gender equality is the easiest thing to talk about these days, if you really want to make a deliberate statement about how ‘cool’ you are. Can you guess what is more effortless than that? Women liberation, especially if you’re a posing intellectual and a gentleman. I presume you can differentiate the two from the word go; because I don’t think the advertising guru-turned-filmmaker R Balki is very comfortable with that. His role-reversal drama KI & KA is exactly like its title; sounds unique and interesting but is confusing, forced and dramatic most of the time. Balki tries to address the relevance of the issue in his most honest & thoughtful manner but fails to make it relatable and logical. I fear the search for ‘coolness’ in everything he shows gets rammed over by his over-confident storytelling.

KIA [Kareena Kapoor] is one of those rare girls who are a complete misfit in any grand and loud Indian wedding party. Such type exists? Anyway, she sees marriages as a big and bold full-stop to the girl’s individuality, personally and professionally. Next, she meets a crying handsome co-passenger KABIR [Arjun Kapoor] in a flight. Cool? Yeah; keep counting. KABIR wants to be a house-husband. Aspirations to earn big positions in any multi-national company or to take shit-load of salary home every month don’t excite him really. He fancies being an artist who makes ‘Homes’ rather than houses like his mother was. It’s a perfect setup. The girl is focused to take control of her promising professional career in the out world and the boy has no shilly-shallying attitude in running the house like a pro. Such a smooth trip until a few fuzzy faceoff incidents takes place in the relationship involving one’s unexpected expansion from being a house-husband to a TEDX celebrity-talker and the other’s steaming ego-issues.

Balki treats his concept of role-reversal in marriage as if it is something very alien and novel idea to the society. On the contrary, it is not. But Balki makes it look so dramatic, droll and desired that it starts irritating you after a while. Soon, his role-reversal theory starts bothering you as a futile role-play. The man becomes a woman and the woman acts like a man. Meanwhile, Balki decides to keep the spotlight on all the ‘cool’ gimmicks rather than exploring the emotional storm within. You see Arjun Kapoor charming married ladies in his neighborhood while giving them a fitness session or inviting them for a kitty-party. His love for riding a Segway or for that matter, making his home a train-toy museum too is more of a ‘cool’ addition to the style than to the substance. In fact, the initiative to put female artists’ name ahead of their male co-artistes in the opening titles loses its steam when it comes to other technical credits. Why is a female assistant director not given the same respect? Because you don’t give a damn!

KI & KA also doesn’t oblige you much if you’re seeking something outstanding in the performances. Kareena Kapoor Khan hams like there is no tomorrow. All she does in the name of acting is to intimidate you with her sparkly wide-eyed expressions and all the increasing now-reducing then redness on her face. Arjun Kapoor, on the other hand, does give you some freshness even if it is exaggerated and overacted. Rajit Kapoor and Swaroop Sampat are extremely delightful faces you would always love to see on screen. Though the writing again makes them stereotyped parents who either would end up being very friendly to their kids or totally cold towards them! Amitabh Bachchan & Jaya Bachchan play themselves in the most celebrated scene as a cameo. The scene beautifully tickles the idea they tackled together on screen in Hrishikesh Mukherji’s ABHIMAAN. It is also supposedly a tour to their drawing room.

Coming from the background of advertising world, Balki makes sure everything looks perfectly placed, lit and shot but he often misses the relativity of the context and in the content. In one scene, Kareena being a marketing professional throws an idea to sell an edible oil product at 50% off if the husbands would make the buying. Her case is that no Indian husband buys grocery and this will improve the sales. In other, we are informed that the couple pays 10,000/- salary to their part-time maid in Delhi. What a promising job opportunity hidden there! Mr. Balki sure belongs to the same rarest wing Kareena targets in the film. Better watch the new ARIEL- share the load commercial, if you want something progressive and feminist in true respect! [2/5]

BAJRANGI BHAIJAAN: Story in a Salman Film! What else could you wish for?? [3/5]

A star, in every possible sense, is born; in a superstar’s film. She plays a cute but mute young girl accidently separated from her family. Her presence on screen alone gives a lot of hope to the film. She hardly makes a sound in this quite ‘loud’ film but still, you will never skip any of the emotions she throws at you through her rewarding smile, wide-eyed heartrending look and an inspiring performance. 7-year old Harshaali Malhotra is a lot more than just a name in the credit rolls. In fact, she is a blessing to Kabir Khan’s BAJRANGI BHAIJAAN- a film that’s targeted to encash one superstar’s glory, fame and fan-base, and surprisingly has a story too. Go ahead, pinch yourself to believe it.

A young mute girl from Pakistan [Harshaali] is left alone across the border in Indian Territory. Good that she meets a Hanuman-loyal Bajrangi [Salman Khan] who, after several failed legal attempts, decides to take her back to Pakistan at his own. Rest is how the good-hearted people from the neighborhood confirm the existence of humanity and compassion within them. Well, Kabir Khan succeeds in offering us a story that has its heart at the right place. But the fact that a Salman Khan film has a story or vice versa a moving story has Salman Khan in it; is enough to make you ready to expect the unexpected. The first part carries the boring & hurriedly-done love-track of Bajrangi with an ever-ready to ‘hit the dance floor’ Rasika [Kareena Kapoor Khan]. The subplot could hint you to the glimpses of the superstar’s previous hits like BODYGUARD & KICK (He’s given 6 months of ultimatum to build a house of his own to marry her).

The second half marks the entry of Nawazuddin Siddiqui- another talent that never disappoints especially when one is desperately looking for something with gravity. Nawaaz plays a small-time Pakistani reporter on the likes of YouTube sensation Chand Nawab. He is even made to recreate that hilarious ‘reporting live at the railway foot-over bridge’ scene too. Search for it on YouTube, if you haven’t yet. Leave a couple of scenes aside, and Nawaaz manages to steal the show from a superstar who’s believed to rule the frame at any given second. His sincerity is so intact that in one scene, his sign-off line to camera goes like, “Cameraman Chaand Nawaab ke saath, Chaand Nawaab” (He’s shooting the video himself)!

In one of the most poignant scenes, Om Puri playing a Pakistani Maulana smells Bajrangi’s inhibitions to do a ‘salaam’ gesture and immediately does ‘Jai Shree Ram’ to make him at ease. BAJRANGI BHAIJAAN gifts us several such scenes where we are told to get over with the zero tolerance attitude towards different religions, without being any preachy. Similarly, the Kashmir issue gets a delightful mention as, “thoda humara bhi toh hai” when describing the Pak owned part of the same name. On the principle cast, Kareena repeats herself and in all the bad senses.

Finally, BAJRANGI BHAIJAAN is not your typical ‘bhai’ film. It is impossible to take out Salman from the Salman Khan; and in a way, we all have learnt to live with it but given the ‘story’ approach, absolutely engaging talents like Harshaali and Nawaaz, I think it is not a bad film at all. Did I actually write it?? Can’t believe myself! Watch out yourself and decide. Till then, I will look out for a valid justification for my verdict. [3/5]

SINGHAM RETURNS: A pair of earplugs could save a lot for you! Rest is all wasted! [2/5]

The consequences of a film joining the over-hyped ‘100 Cr’ club could be many but one you don’t really want to face in most cases, is its inescapable and obvious sequel. Rohit Shetty’s SINGHAM RETURNS is one of those. As a fellow cop in the team makes it loud and clear soon after hero’s grand entry on screen, “Gaanv se shaher badla hai par apne Bajirao Singham ke kaam karne ka tareeka ab bhi wahi hai”! Translation could read, “Only the locations have been changed and the settings, Singham is all the same”. Spot on! SINGHAM RETURNS is a mindless action entertainer that tickles your heart less and hammers on your head more. I hope it hints you enough to carry earplugs and a couple of pills, in case of severe headache!

The new playground for Bajirao Singham [Ajay Devgn back in his vest & khaki avatar] is the city of Mumbai where corrupt politicians force their own set of rules to rule. An Anna Hazare in disguise idealistic Guruji [Anupam Kher in an extended guest appearance] is unwavering about cleaning the filth called corruption and black money from politics but the evil forces including barely a sketchy politician [Zakir Hussain in his probably most attempted character on screen] and a phony holyman who immediately gets into his cool casuals with a glass of beer in hands when not in some public appearances, have their own vicious plans. Singham returns to fight for freedom, justice and enforcement of law in the system, against these mean minds.

Rohit Shetty’s SINGHAM RETURNS clearly shows his over-confidence in the most usual and sub-standard plot. An honest cop’s frustration and distress while on duty leads him to be transformed into a fearless fighter who can also go beyond law to teach lawbreakers a hard lesson. So far so good! So far some respite! But when you see Ajay devgn mouthing dialogues like, “dhoom machaani hai machao, par bike ki gati [speed] par nahin, desh ki pragati [progress] par”, you sure can guess where it’s going. And SINGHAM RETURNS does that often. Where the first half is quite alike any regular episode of the longest running cop-drama CID on TV [You can also find the loveably single-minded Daya here to act on his favorite, “Daya, Darwaja tod do!”, second half is more of Shetty-special shootouts, blasts and ceaseless gravity-defying goon-bashing sequences.     

The other part that doesn’t go well with the film is the love-track! Kareena Kapoor plays Avni who besides dreaming to own a franchise of salon, can be seen frenzied over the idea of her marriage to Singham. It is the least appreciated thing if you have especially come out to see a Rohit Shetty Action entertainer. On the performances, Ajay does what people love to see him doing. A macho man who is invincible, intrepid and heroic in every sense! Kareena irritates, well mostly! Amole Gupte slips into the skin of Chandraswamy like Guru of political influences well and succeeds in providing some not sufficient but good laughs.

At the end, a strict warning for parents! If the child artist’s ‘mala raga gheto hai’ act in Yo Yo Honey Singh’s ‘Aati majhi satakali’ song looks cute to you and your kid, it doesn’t necessarily mean the film is for kids! Stop taking your kids in each and every film you go for! It is like in between those blasting-flying-on fire SUVs in the film, you see a trapped Tata Nano being driven by Ajay Devgn and you go into serious prayers, “No, not this! Don’t! You can’t!” Watch it only if you’re one of those unfortunates who are still at home on this extended weekend! Rest, do not bother! [2/5]

GORI TERE PYAAR MEIN!: So regular & cliché that you want it to end in the interval only! Forget it! [2/5]

Ok, I have been on trip for enough now. My first outing as a filmmaker happened 3 years back & was quite a successful effort (…and forgetful too) to place me in the club of ‘filmmakers of young generation’. So, it’s time to hit back since everyone around me is expecting it…but with what? Or in this case, with whom? Well, with my mentor who has always been in the business and not a hard nut to crack if it is anything associated with candyfloss urban romantic comedies! Who else but the Karan Johar and his Dharma Productions!

So, it’s final! It would be another boy-meets-girl romantic film with some good peppy song & dance numbers [nicely planned 3 before interval & 3 after interval], charmingly cute hero, the most desirable zero-sized heroine and all glossy decked up stylish look & feel. Done. After all, it is the safest bet in Bollywood. But wait; there should be something new, something additional, some kind of twist that can set me up as a sensitive filmmaker who dares to push his boundaries. Yes, we will literally push our boundaries from posh apartments in Metros to some remote village with a name vaguely resembled with Bollywood’s pet ‘Jhumri Telaiya’. And guess what? LAGAAN has always been my all-time favourite film. I always have this dream about shooting my film in a village, at least remade in Mumbai Filmcity with all necessities [Luxury is so negative] intact.

    

Now the story! Do we really need one? Only if you are asking, the boy is a spoilt brat who doesn’t want to spend his nights at home and sings ‘izzat se, kiss my a**’ at the discothèque. The girl here is fun loving, dynamic & very much focused in life. She can be seen dining in the best of the restaurants in town & shaking her bum on ‘Tooh’ in a high-profile ‘shaadi’ but still she is very much an environmentalist reminding one of Shabana Azmi. They meet. Love happens. Principles clash. They break-up. Enters a new girl! She makes him realise that all he really wants from life is nothing but the girl. Interval. Now to win her back, boy has to travel all the way to our ‘Jhumri Telaiya’ and work for the welfare of its villagers. Interesting no?

& now to make it a sure-shot success, all we need is good casting. What about Imran Khan? He looks one spoilt brat, more than that he looks great on screen. He fits the bill. Really? But our boy belongs to a Tamilian family. What about dialect? Who cares, especially when even his simple Hindi sounds as some tough tongue-twister! We will also play some cheesy one-liners around his fairness as ‘hospital mein badli ho gaya tha’. Funny, isn’t it? The girl can only be played by the glam doll Kareena Kapoor Khan. She is meant to be a sensible actor who can look exactly as pretty-as made-up as she could be, even if she is playing a deglam role [remember her real life journalist in SATYAGRAHA].

So, this is yours truly Punit Malhotra and since my second film GORI TERE PYAAR MEIN! is out now; I am here to sell my film to you. Well, it is anything but a regular love-story as you can decide yourself by going through paragraphs written above. The film in fact is so satisfying [or annoying with clichés], you would like it to end in the interval only. Songs will give you plenty of time in between to take loo-breaks. Our village is very different from what you have seen in real life. People here are either workshy or professional dancers responsible for entertainment & only entertainment.

Overall, it is a film that will not harm you if you won’t mess with it. It is a film that believes in ‘forgive & forget’. You should forgive all the clichés and forget it immediately after leaving the theatre. It is a film that is best to enjoy if you have nothing else to do…and I mean NOTHING else to do. [2/5]