GONE GIRL: Miss it…and you will miss it! [4/5]

She is a Type A. She is a decorated scholar, bright and kind in personality. 5 years in the institution called marriage and still, you wouldn’t notice a single line of discontentment on her highly proud forehead. She is the ‘amazing Amy’ her proud parents has based their bedtime-story series on. She herself is a writer with almost no friends in the quite friendlier town of Missouri. She is missing from her house, under suspicious circumstances. 

He is a Type B. He is a writer too but the mean times of recession have had him quite bad. His double-chinned face has a villainous impression, according to his wife of 5 years. He’s lethargically casual, wittily complaining and looks hardly convinced about his wife & marriage. He is the prime suspect behind his wife’s disappearance, possibly murdered by now.

David Fincher is back in theatres with GONE GIRL- a relentlessly engaging missing-drama that never approves you sitting quietly through any of its chain of events. The incredulity in the character you had just made likeable to you and your own sense of judgment getting activated soon after the air gets clear keeps you in an unsettling mood & mode of ‘What might have happened?’ to ‘What actually has happened?”.

Adapted for the screen from the bestselling novel by screenwriter Gillian Flynn, GONE GIRL is more of a psychological drama than a crime-thriller. One fine morning on his Fifth marriage anniversary, Nick [Messily cool & composed Ben Affleck] returns to his home to find his wife Amy [Mysteriously ‘a treat-to-eyes’ Rosamund Pike] missing. Before the local detectives [Kim Dickens plays one of the two] could actually give the investigation a demanding pace comes the frenzied whirl of media to cover the story. It takes no time to trace the disrespect, missing love, dishonesty and the tense-air between the two in the married life. Rest follows the twisted plot, diverse perspectives to events and a layer-on-layer dissection of the most researched and widely conversed social school of commitment i.e. marriages!

Taking from the original work of fiction, David creates a parallel narrative of one in present with Nick getting plunged into the proceedings of investigation, while the other goes back in regular intervals to revisit the good old times of romance blooming in the air. David successfully hammers on the role of media and the broaden technology juicing the best they want. When the mother announces a dedicated website & hotline number to find any clue of her missing daughter, you sure find yourself in the midst of generous giggling and joining it with equal force.

With a haunting background score and commendably cinematographed scenes, GONE GIRL gels well with absolutely in-sync performances of Affleck and Pike both. Affleck with his paunchy, weathered, sluggish look and the contagious resilience in attitude delivers his most pitiable yet pretentious character on screen. Pike surprises you with the most being unforeseen and undercover due to the twists in the plot. I wish I could unravel more to add more to illustrate her part here. In short and sweet, it’s a stellar.

And the final word on the film! GONE GIRL is one the best thrillers, this year! No doubt on that. The duration and the pace could sure make you shifting eyes from the screen but the finesse in the storytelling and the craftsmanship involved will pay you back of your every single penny spent on it. Missing this ‘Missing Story’ is not at all recommended! [4/5] 

HAPPY NEW YEAR: 8-pack doesn’t disappoint! Laughter pack does! [2/5]

Farah Khan’s HAPPY NEW YEAR has blockbuster written all over it. So is Farah Khan’s trademark sense of humor coming out of anything & everything from sexist scrutiny and racist remarks to murderous-merciless mocking at the purest human emotions people usually love to cherish! So if you find nothing bad in ‘alag sirf NAME hain, baaki sab SAME hain’ comment on how Korean and Chinese people look relatively identical to a common ignorant Indian; there are chances you will love HAPPY NEW YEAR for its unarguably pathetic gags, hamming performances and an uneventful heist-plot even any of Farah Khan’s cute triplet could come up to start with.

HAPPY NEW YEAR is nothing but a wastrel celebration of two Khan’s collaboration for a gala event where audiences are cordially invited but their sensibility is taken for granted at many levels. The man on mission here is Charlie [Shah Rukh Khan], a son seeking revenge of his father’s unjust fate from a rich heartless fraud [Jackie Shroff]. To give him back what he deserves, Charlie plans to rob him of his diamonds worth gallons of millions. And there forms, a group of six losers as they love to call themselves with a mother-powered unmarried Parsi [Boman], a tapori [Abhishek], a bar dancer [Deepika], a young tech-savvy hacker [Vivaan] and a strapping & stripping stuntman [Sonu Sood]! But before the D-day comes, they have to be on stage participating in the ‘World Dance Championship’ i.e. ‘India’s got talent’ goes global!

Being unapologetically self-assured about her idea of mass-entertainment, Farah hardly tries to sound or look smart when it comes to give us a plot tagged with predictability as its only nature. Do not think harder or rather not even attempt it and you will easily foresee the next sharp turn ahead. Same goes with the gags. It’s either someone who can’t speak English or someone who has hearing impairment to produce cheap word-plays. Before Shah Rukh playing the master-planner and the captain of the ship comes up with the punch line spoken thrice in the film, “Every loser gets at least one chance to emerge as the winner”; let me tell you the concept of losers shown here. The Parsi brat stammers. The bar dancer constantly gets humiliated as being ‘Bazaaru Aurat’ by no one lesser than our leading man himself and easily falls in trap with his charming looks and English speaking skills. How pitiable can our Indian ladies be! At least in bollywood movies! On the other hand, we have Sonu Sood playing a strong-built single-headed who can jump into a fight soon someone shows disrespect to his mother but he himself doesn’t hesitate mouthing foul words having sisters in center. Double standards! Whatever creates humor!

With a tiring, tedious and repetitive 3 hours of duration, HAPPY NEW YEAR falls short of juicy dialogues, enjoyable dance numbers and praiseworthy performances. Only breathing space you notice is Shah Rukh’s magnetic screen presence, Deepika’s charismatic dance moves and Abhishek’s comic relief but as if Farah would not compromise with her instinct to ruin all emotions, she brings patriotism in the scene just before you try to locate the exit. You can be talent-killer. You can proudly be a robber. You also can be insensitively rude towards your fellow member of human race but just one patriotic song at the end with a tricolor in the backdrop and no one could ever question your heroism. Anyways, who bothers if the man in question is the king of Bollywood himself!

I clearly remember having greater laughs in a couple of ‘Comedy night with Kapil’ episodes on TV where the cast of HAPPY NEW YEAR appeared as its promotional routine. Well, I better go search those on YouTube after resting my case here.  That was epic! This is gimmick! A wafer pack full with air, if you get it! Watch it if you must! [2/5]

THE JUDGE: Robert & Robert make it an interesting watch! Recommended! [4/5]

Before he excelled in charming us all as the nifty, sharp, flirtatious and witty Tony Stark in the movie-adaptations of the IRON MAN comic series, Robert Downey Jr. has managed quite well donning the cap of a serious actor [Sir Richard Attenborough’s CHAPLIN is the testimony, anyone would swear to respect] surfacing from a numerous ‘Coming of Age’ films. It’s an absolute treat to watch him returning to a plain grounded drama filled with deep dark secrets of a family, relationships holding their own share of protests, outbursts and empathy untold before. And as if one Robert was not enough, Robert Duvall also joins him for absorbingly heartwarming father-son relationship played on screen.

David Dobkin’s THE JUDGE is about Hank Palmer [Robert the junior] a sure and secured attorney finding himself mostly on the sides of the guilty as he vouches for himself, “The innocents can’t afford me”. With a marriage on the threshold of divorce and a pretty smart daughter by his side, Hank’s life takes him back to his native place where his Judge father [Robert the senior] is fighting hard with life after his wife’s death. Hank has hardly any regards for the place that doesn’t have a thing for any change but the current state of affairs leads him to the state of uncertainties, in terms of his leaving the place. The Judge is under scan by local police for murdering one of the convicts, he shares his past with.

THE JUDGE works well with characters that never shed their skin for once and still keep you engaged with a constant hint of surprise in every emotion. Hank is smart, self-assured and an everyday guy who doesn’t want to get confined into a place where his father is actually known to be firm, strict and honest about his morals. This old man has been serving the law for over 40 years now and no matter if he’s on the other side, still doesn’t want to comprise with truth and cooperate with his own son trying every trick of the trade to save his father’s life. Now, the emotions are real heavy and could have been misjudged for a melodramatic tint to it but thanks to the practically sensible approach and the clear air of the characterization, you find an invariable expression of smile on your face for the most.

Robert Downey Jr. intrigues the viewers with his charismatic and confident presence on screen and yes, the witty one-liners he mouths perfectly are worth giggling. Robert Duvall as a morally moody old man gives us a hypnotic performance you want to take away with yourself to appreciate long after leaving the theatre. The frames with both the Roberts together are the most enjoyable scenes. Be it the courtroom scene where they both bring out their deepest emotions towards each other, the bathroom sequence with son helping his aging father trying to wash him or the scenes they confront each other’s point of reference in law and life are amazing!

Vera Farmiga as Hank’s ex-girlfriend shines in a comparatively short role. Emma Themblay impresses as Hank’s daughter who very innocently informs his father, “Mothers get lonely. Fathers don’t. Fathers marry young Mommies”. Overall, THE JUDGE should find a definite viewer in you if you truly believe in emotions we hardly share with our family. As for Hank in the film, this would be a nice, feel-good, emotional homecoming to you also! What better occasion than this festive season! Go for It! [4/5]  

EKKEES TOPPON KI SALAAMI: A satisfying change from regular slapstick comedies! Give it a shot! [3/5]

The lower middle class has been vanished from Hindi films for quite some time now. The last time we had something notable belonged to that part of the Indian population was Rajat Kapoor’s thoroughly believable and psychological introspective drama ANKHON DEKHI. EKKEES TOPPON KI SALAAMI is far from joining that masterstroke in the same rank but that’s only because it chooses to be a mainstream film polluted with songs that rarely come with a dependable explanation and lousy melodrama meant to target the larger part of the picture. Still, it is a film with good content and a wise intent to highlight an honest common man’s want to have at least an honorable end to his struggled for long life.

If given a chance, most would die to be born again but not to the same parents! Shekhar [Manu Rishi] and Subhash [Divyendu Sharma of PYAR KA PUNCHNAMA] never really approve their father’s lesser paid government job and his rock steady moral values to stay honest at any cost. Things change when Purushottam Joshi [Played by Anupam Kher] dies with false charge of being a corrupt employee just before he was to be retired. And now the sons are left with his last wish to have a 21 gun salute at his final ceremonial service in order to regain his lost respect.

Ravindra Gautam’s EKKEES TOPPON KI SALAAMI is a satirical take on today’s youth, political scenarios, and on the changing phase and face of media too. So, you will find many interesting characters and the deadpan jokes and good one-liners coming in free flow every now and then. When a state chief-minister [Rajesh Sharma] gets exposed in a scam of allotting government bungalow to his love-interest a flop Bollywood actress [Neha Dhupia], all he is concerned about the sum of the scam as it is too small to put him in the big league. You will also see a power-hungry mother [the veteran Uttara Baokar] pitching herself to the High Command modeled on the powerful kingmaker of Congress, as her son’s worthy successor. There is also a struggling writer in films [Aditi Sharma] now writing officially for the chief minister and in one sequence intelligently translates all his abusive, offensive and insulting remarks into a politically correct press-release.

Filled with humor [most come from corruption & politics] and drama [soaked in middle-class values] that might sound outdated, film falters in the second half when most of the events look too convenient to be convincing and it all takes too much time to fizzle into the climax. Never mind! The performances never bore you. Anupam Kher outshines everyone and emerges as the strongest pillar of the film. With shades and emotions borrowed from any common man’s life, this one is his most absorbing performance in recent. Absolutely flawless! Manu Rishi & Divyendu don’t disappoint and stay true to their roles. Rajesh Sharma showers plenty of laughs and gags as the corrupt, lewd and loud-mouthed politician pampered by his opportunist mother. Uttara Baokar excels in that role. Neha Dhupia sizzles with her caricature-ish portrayal of camera-loving actress, especially in ‘Ghoor Ghoor Ke’ song where she appears as most of the top bollywood actresses in their best on-screen avatars.

To conclude, EKKEES TOPPON KI SALAAMI succeeds in making you uncomfortable with emotionally charged-up sequences but also gives you enough room to laugh out loud. A must if you want a satisfying change from regular double-meaning, sexy, slapsticks! [3/5].

TAMANCHEY: Miss it, as it misses the target for the most! [1.5/5]

A foul-mouthed girl minding her own business of leading a drug-racket in Delhi-NCR! An abductor with a heart ever ready to sing love-songs! And they bond over fascinating crime-stories during their break away from the cops. We don’t see an odd couple like them very often in Bollywood, especially with the character Richa Chaddha plays in the film but that’s that and no meat to seize your teeth in, in its paper-thin plot.

Visually directed by Navneet Behal [Yeah, that’s how he chooses to put his name in the credits; probably because of the row over creative differences with the other Creative Director Suryaveer Singh Bhullar], TAMANCHEY has all the ingredients of a masala-entertainer but miserably wrong in their proposed measures. Result? A tasteless comedy, cold as corpse drama, rough & bumpy action sequences and absolutely watery performances!

Munna with an eastern UP dialect [Nikhil Dwivedi] meets Babu [Richa Chaddha] from Delhi. The guy is in the business of kidnapping capitalists and the girl is an independent drug-dealer from the ‘Capitol’. On the run, they fall in love and that is the least thing Rana- a Haryanvi don who owns the girl [Played by Debutante Damandeep Sidhu] would approve. What follows next is hardly inventive or original unless you meet the climax. Hear this out because I know many would give this film a miss. The murderous couple in love is surrounded by cops in an abandoned building and in cloudy moments of despair, they decide to play ‘husbands-wives’ game everyone must have in their childhood. Trying hard to make you cry, to make you feel for the characters but it’s too late. The bullets have gone backfire and there is just a plain smoke left for you to succumb in suffocation and depression.

Leave the characterization alone as that’s the only part I think the makers had worked on, and everything else is so flat as burst tyres. The screenplay barely induces any spark of excitement in you. You are left with some funny dialogues, to be précised one or two sequences to rely your urge of watching something substantial and Richa Chaddha who’s directed more to show off her physical curves and cleavages than her confident in the role. She’s been perfectly cast as a blunt, sharp and gutsy girl who can land herself comfortably in any panicky situation. Though this would not be considered amongst her best of works, she’s the only flicker of relief. Nikhil Dwivedi doesn’t hesitate to put his best efforts but sadly that never turns into a visible result. Damandeep Sidhu is an identified name in theater-world in Delhi and no doubt this role has lots in terms of the length and the time spent on screen but I wish he could use more flares of his acting skills to his one-dimensional villainous act.

Overall, TAMANCHEY as it sounds is a gunshot loaded full of smoke and big bang but misses its target by large margin. And who would want that? Especially when we have the all flashy and stylized firearms in muscular hands of Greek God ruling over box-office [read: BANG BANG] and the brother-turns rival-to another with Kalashnikov shooting off fire of hatred and revenge to win critical acclaim from allover [read: HAIDER] still running in theatres. Don’t make this an option! [1.5/5]  

BANG BANG: Mission Entertainment, Failed! [2/5]

Tom Cruise-Cameron Diaz starrer KNIGHT AND DAY wasn’t an extraordinary action movie outing at the first place; so when Bollywood has come up with an idea to officially remake it, expecting anything better to come out of it is surely our fault and not of the makers. Since Bollywood has now become quite an expert with remaking their own classics into the most forgettable ones, you can only imagine what would have they done with an average Hollywood action thriller. Siddharth Anand’s BANG BANG is a regular bollywood junk suitable only to those who crave for quick, forgettable and mindless adrenaline rush for their dose of entertainment.

Rajveer [Played by the delectably charming Hrithik] is a daredevil wanted for stealing the historical Kohinoor Diamond from a museum in London and can frequently be seen in Shimla roaming with the ‘diamond’ in his pocket. In a ‘written as in the script’ incident, he meets a middle-class desperate girl [Katrina, of course] with starry dreams to tour the world someday. And now the both should be together in the hide & seek game with cops [Pavan Malhotra, wasted] & the international crime syndicates [Danny Denzongpa & Javed Jaffrey] to save each other’s lives. But there is a twist, Rajveer is hardly who he pretends to be.

Problems with BANG BANG never really end. Where the original Hollywood flick had its own share of logic behind every action and plot developments, this Bollywood version hardly tries to be imaginative or logical. One action sequence leads to an abrupt song & dance number followed by another action sequence and another song & dance number! This goes on & on until the intermission. You take the loo-break, join the movie and it starts all over again. The most irritating transitions between scenes are Katrina waking up in the bed, in a new location, in a new country. 2 hours 35 minutes and you hardly see a smart espionage moment. Yes, there are brilliantly performed action thrills but no moment of shock even in the climax. If you could not see it coming, that’s never because of their excellence but your inattentiveness.  

Siddharth actually doesn’t leave any stone unturned to make it a proper Bollywood film. A bollywood film that never doubts on the moves of its hero, in fact it tries to cover him up. BANG BANG does exactly the same…with all of the film. So, more than 25 films in her name and we still have to give reasons [read: excuses] for Katrina’s accented vocal presentation. So she might possess ‘Harleen’ as her name, she is a Canada born child whose parents are dead in a terrible road accident [as convenient as swimming is to a fish] and now she is living with her grandmother in Shimla from last 10 years or more. Established in first half an hour, now do not you dare to ask why she can’t talk in proper accent?

My two favorite moments are probably the only moment I had an effortless smile on my face. When press asks the grandmother about Harleen’s whereabouts, she tells them that she had to consult her lawyer first and one media-person reacts, “Dadi, American serials dekhna band karo!” In other, Hrithik makes faces and pun about Katrina’s boring single life and her search for boyfriend on dating sites. Genuinely funny and natural!

On the performances, Hrithik manages to keep everyone hooked with his ease at action, silkiness in dance and the big screen charisma of the heroic chiseled-oiled body muscles. Deepti Naval & Kanwaljeet mark their presence felt. Rests in the supporting cast are either wasted completely or extremely regular. Watch out if breathtaking locales, hard to imitate dance moves, some good action sequences and your favorite stars are enough to make you spend [read: waste] your precious time and hard-earned money. It deserves nothing less than a place in the list of AAP MUJHE ACHCHE LAGNE LAGE and KITES! [2/5].

HAIDER: A Bollywood rare that tries to speak…emotionally & politically! [4/5]

1995, Kashmir. When single screen cinemas like Faraz & Sheila in Srinagar were turned into a full-fledged army camps & detention centers, we at the other side were probably unscathed enjoying those terribly silly love-stories on VHS in our drawing rooms and least bothered about that ‘integral part’ of our country. Calling it ‘integral’ itself is an irony. We normally don’t do that to other states. Are we? Vishal Bhardwaj’s HAIDER is a strong political statement retold and represented covered in the long dark shrouds of Shakespearian emotional saga. It’s depressingly sad, gloomy, violent, nerve-racking and makes you bleed emotionally.

Haider [Played by Shahid Kapoor] returns to his soil after his father goes missing in the bleak times of militancy contaminating the Jhelum waters. The disappearance soon gets linked with the unseen before closeness between his mother [Immeasurably talented Tabu] and his power-hungry uncle [Kay Kay Menon in a well-suited comfortable role]. The hunt for the missing and the haunting ache of losing all his emotional supports lands him into the fiery world of hatred, vengeance and revolt at personal front.   

Adopted from ‘Hamlet’ of William Shakespeare, HAIDER suffers from the 'Chutzpah' of Vishal Bhardwaj as a deep and sound filmmaker who ruthlessly puts you through the gloomiest atmospheric tale of Kashmir in the times of brutal political turmoil. This is the time of ambiguity when even the closest to your heart can ask you, “Whose side are you on?”. This is the time when ‘Freedom’ merely has just one connotation to it. The burnt doors, broken windows, unclaimed houses and people holding their identity cards waiting in line for getting searched; Bhardwaj sensitively paints the pain and melancholia in the air. There is a scene actually where a man in a mental shock refuses to enter his own house before being searched by anyone. Created to give you a moment to laugh but really?

In its one of the most comical sequences, Vishal Bhardwaj gives us two of Salman Khan fans who also share the name with Salman and run a VHS parlor. There are also moments and elements snitched from the original work like the slightest intimation of layered mother-son relationship. It does make you uncomfortable at first but the makers deserve a pat on back for such bold baby-step. In other, watch out for the old gravediggers stealing the moment at the climax.

And now the performances! Not many might be familiar with Narendra Jha by name but this man exceeds all expectations as a fine performer in the role of Haider’s father. You will find Kashmir in him in all senses. Tabu as an unsettling soul seeking serenity is a mesmerizing presence on screen. She makes us miss her more in films. Kay Kay Menon is comfortably in his zone. Somehow, this is a role we have seen him wearing like a skin. Shraddha Kapoor doesn’t leave any scope to complain. Irrfan Khan in a special appearance brings a good amount of joy and a flare of surprise.

And then there is Shahid Kapoor! Where in the first part he hardly shows anything unforeseen and mostly repeats himself, in the second half he completely blows you off with a brilliantly acted monologue piece and constantly reinventing his acting skills!                 

Despite all this, there is of course a muddled theatrical concluding part, bearably lengthy duration of nearly 3 hours and harshly done back and forth narrative to offer a bumpy ride and a sense of dissatisfaction but the melancholic shades in the characters and in the character of Kashmir both painted beautifully by some of the most sincere and serious performances make HAIDER an experience worth putting your time and money in. A bollywood film trying to speak is rare and should get a warm welcome! (4/5)